Tuesday, September 15, 2009

HOLDING ON AND RIDING IT OUT

I am very frustrated. I'm trying to maintain because I really think I'm pms-ing but I cant shake this feeling. I'm getting tired of being sick and tired. I feel like I'm marching in place. No movement at all. I have prayed and cried and cried and prayed. I don't like to complain. I am healthy, blessed, employed, loved . But I feel trapped. I don't know if I'm strong enough to stand. I know I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me but I don't know if I have a desire to be this strong. I want it easy. I don't want to fight. My vision totally different than the actual view. I realize in this its not always promised peaches and cream but that's what I want. I'm not angry just over it. Like really I could walk away and feel nothing but relief. In this situation not a good place to be. But I trust God and that old saying if he brought you to it he will bring you through it. So I suppose I am holding on and riding it out. I look to the hills my help comes from the Lord. BUT DEAR LORD COME NOW!!!!

3 comments:

  1. Vent and get it off your chest that's why God gives us friends. I understand I feel the same way. I was just telling my friend something similar last night. Just praise him in advance. That's what I'm doing

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  2. Thanks for sharing your blog with me. I did't even know you were doing this.I just want to let you know I'm proud of you.Yoa are a very good writer.We have been friends for most of our lives and I never knew you wrote so well. You are very expressive and just from reading your blogs I feel I know you a little better than I ever have.I thought I knew just about everything about you. I am delightfully surprised.Go Girl. As for feeling the way you do, I think it's normal. Although I'm feeling the exact opposite right now.I feel like everthing is going so fast and I am just trying to savor each and every moment.I think you are blessed and equip to do whatever it is your heart desires. Luv YA

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  3. You are right where you are suppose to be Boogie! In this, God is developing what you need for this season in your life. You will cry and it will be painful but you han handle it. You have been in God's class room before so you are well equipped to take the test. All you can do is stay focussed and pass it so you don't have to repeat the test!

    That is a real feeling. A honest place to be. But you have to encourage yourself and lean on God. He hears you. TRUST ME HE DOES! But for whatever reason it is not time to come out yet. When you are frying chicken and you take the meat out too soon, you can get sick. You are not ready yet. You are still being prepared and cooked dear. I am praying for you and I can't wait to hear the testimony from this.

    Read 1 Thessalonians 3! IT will encourage you. It talked about how Paul was so worried and concerned about the Christians faith that he could not rest. So he could not go see them so he sent Timothy. It will help you! Also my favorite scripture Psalms 40:1-3 (message version)
    I waited and waited and waited for God. At last he looked; finally he listened.
    He lifted me out of the ditch,
    pulled me from deep mud.
    He stood me up on a solid rock
    to make sure I wouldn't slip.
    He taught me how to sing the latest God-song,
    a praise-song to our God.
    More and more people are seeing this:
    they enter the mystery,
    abandoning themselves to God.

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